Ladies and Gentlemen!
The word is: Dingbat.

I do not mean to a bitchy organ, but I must admit that it is MY FAULT that Bonnie is so reluctant to do custom orders these days.

As some of you may know, I tried to kill Bonnie a couple of years ago with a pesky little tumor. Geez, some people get all bent out of shape over one measly ruptured adenoma!
(Caused by birth control pills! This happens to .004% of women! Even as a non-dating single nerd, Bonnie was told for many years by her doctors to take the pill to prevent cancer...)

Bonnie's fine now, but no longer does art shows. She has a super-cool mega scar that would make Dwight Schrute proud!

Anyway, now Bonnie has this really annoying attitude of just wanting to make what she wants to make and hoping the right person falls in love with it.

Now, if you think I'M an annoying organ, you should see Bonnie's BRAIN!!! Those surgeries, on top of finding her beloved cat's murdered body, SERIOUSLY messed with her mind.

Bonnie was a total dingbat before, but now she's

TURBO DINGBAT!

Seriously, she doesn't remember any dang thing! She sees people and has no idea who they are, even if they were in the studio the day before. Usually all she can think is "Omigosh, what did I forget?" or "This is a nice person, but I don't remember why" or "Is this someone who will hurt the animals?" even though that only happened twice.

Now you know why custom orders, if Bonnie agrees to them, take forever. And why this web site is the way it is.

So if you want some jewelry or drawer pulls, please email Bonnie and she will send you photos of what is in stock. If you do not hear back, please please please email again. She's either out of town, super-slammed with a spay/neuter clinic or a fundraiser, or she just plain FORGOT!!

Turbo Dingbat. I am telling you.

Have patience, dear friends. For you are dealing with a moron dingbat.

Sincerely,

Her Liver

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OK, here's what happened. All of a sudden my period wouldn't stop. I'm not talking spotting. It was really bad. so then I find out Grandma and her sister and my Mom and my sister all had to have hysterectomies when they were in their late 30's and here I was in my 40's, so it was clear there was a problem there. But I said, "Oh, no, I don't want a hysterectomy, I'm too scared to have surgery, I'm afraid of needles, what else can we try?"

so we tried nutritional supplements, didn't work. Tried a European IUD. Didn't work. Hurt like Hell.
Then tried some heavy duty birth control pills, extra strength - like they used to be when they first came on the market....
and they worked!!!!!

Unfortunately, they also gave me a LIVER TUMOR. Yes ladies, it's on the warning label. They say it happens .002% of the time. I truly hope somebody is keeping track.

And then the Doc and every nurse I talked to said "WHAT!!! You're VEGAN? Well you gotta eat meat, your liver won't grow back if you don't eat meat!" And even though I KNEW doctors don't know anything about nutrition, well, when they take off part of your liver, you feel kind of vulnerable. It's easy to get bossed around at that point.

I would also like to mention that the hospital menu had no salad, but did have Cheeseburgers, Fries, and Pizza.

and They made me eat Jello. I could not leave till I ate 2 Jellos. that's all I could eat.

So that's the story.

Oh, yeah. Six months later I got the hysterectomy. I LOVE being fixed!!! And all the animals of Montana say HA!! Back at you, lady!

I never wanted kids anyway. Maybe you noticed, there are enough humans here already. The End.

ps. I'm still afraid of needles.